Archive for April, 2005

Windows Reinstall Blues


2005
04.27

If you want to learn how to use computers what you need to do is take your computer to a crossroads. Get there a while before midnight to make sure you are there on time. Mess with your computer and don’t leave no matter what you see. At midnight a pale, long haired man in a trench coat will appear at the cross roads. Give him your computer – he will reinstall Windows XP. After that you will be able to do anything with your computer.

Choosing Anti-Virus Software for the Small Enterprise


2005
04.21

Notes to self really…

The goal posts keep shifting – you find a good Anti-Virus package and six months down the line they have changed the pricing structure or how subscription renewals work and you have to start all over again to find the best deal…

When I worked at UCL the college had a volume license for Sophos Anti-Virus. I admired the simplicity of the package – no whistles and bells like Norton. After moving to The Prostate Cancer Charity and taking responsibility for running the computer systems I found they too had a license with Sophos.

Since leaving TPCC I have experienced various anti-virus products through freelance work and sorting out my own PC. Norton seems to be everywhere, by fact of being packaged for free with many new PCs. I am turned off Norton after finding an office of 30 computers in Nairobi which all needed full manual uninstalls for a variety of reasons. After that I wouldn’t touch Norton with a shitty stick. Besides, it uses much more disk space and memory than I think necessary.

The thing is people in businesses are so used to Norton that they want to keep it. But Norton really isn’t good for businesses with a file and email server. It is much better to buy into an enterprise level system which protects the server. Consumer packages like Norton just don’t cut it.

So what are the choices:

Sophos
Lightweight serious AV. They seem to be the last of the bunch to have sorted out automatic updates – they used to mail a CD out every month!
Trend
Last year this was the most cost effective option. Recent changes to their pricing have made this less attractive, but still a competitor.
Symantec
Lost points for being from the same stable as Norton. Never tried it and the pricing is not competitive with either of the above
Grisoft
Make the free AVG anti-virus. The corporate edition is cheap, but email protection is by mailbox rather than server – not good.

To speak to an operator dial 0


2005
04.05

At the risk of getting hits from people not really searching for anything on this site (apart from perhaps those who look for the term “anal plug”) I wanted to share this:

I have been asked to do an emailable newsletter for a company called Sygen. I have been having some trouble finding out exactly what they want from this newsletter, so I made a call to their office in Kentucky, USA. The phone was answered my an automated response machine with the following options:

  • For an employee directory dial 1
  • For semen purchases dial 2
  • To speak to an operator dial 0

I suppose in some circles it is considered pretty puerile to giggle at this sort of thing, but I really wasn’t expecting it…